How is everyone doing?

By Bill Fox/Columnist

I was wondering how parents are dealing with home schooling their children right now. We had four young boys in elementary school at one time, and I think if that were the case today, I would have the oldest student teaching the youngest, giving the parent-teacher a little break.

There are four things I think can help us through the challenging months ahead.

1. Listen to the healthcare professionals and our politicians and do as they ask. Stay at home as much as possible, practice physical distancing, always wash our hands correctly and often, and reach out to those living alone.
2. Some readers may think I am encouraging religious practices as we are in Holy Week. While there is nothing wrong with that, I would encourage spirituality as the weeks pass. I believe getting in touch with our spiritual world can aid us in our serenity. I trust that through all the challenges of COVID-19, we may all learn some important lessons about what is really important in our lives, including the fact we are never alone. However you imagine our creator, he/she is with us. Also with us, I believe, are close relatives who, though no longer with us, may very well be spiritually still with us. I daily ask my departed younger brother, my mom and my dad, to give all our relatives, health, happiness, holiness (spirituality) sprinkled with hilarity- the four Hs… I feel like I should start a Four-H club!
3. Music as I wrote a few columns ago can be a real mood changer. I know that in our home music is always playing in the background. For the most part it gives my wife and I a soothing backdrop to our days. My wife is also a talented singer/guitarist and pianist and will practice for at least an hour a day on new songs she likes.
4. Lastly it is important to maintain a sense of humour during these trying days. A study was done years ago asking several hundred young men what they would consider the most important characteristic of the woman they would seek to marry. While you might imagine physical attributes might be first, surprisingly what they wanted most was a woman with a sense of humour. Similarly when young women were surveyed they too mentioned a sense of humour is the most important characteristic of their future husbands. It is easy today if we watch the news all day long to lose some of our sense of humour. A doctor friend says we should watch the news no more than two times a day.

So to help your sense of humour, children were asked questions about the Bible. Their answers, with corrections, are below:

– In the first book of the Bible, Guinness’s, God got tired of creating the world so he took the Sabbath off.

– Adam and Eve were created from an Apple tree. Noah’s wife was called Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark and the animals came on in pears.

– Lot’s wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.

– The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic Genitals.

– Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.

– The seventh Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery, nor pretend you are older than you really are.

– Moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.

– When Mary heard she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna Carta.

– Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

– St. John the blacksmith dumped water on his head.

– Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do unto others before they do one to you. He also explained, a man doth not live by sweat alone.

– The epistles were the wives of the apostals.

– One of the oppossums was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.

– Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.

Please stay well folks, physically, socially, mentally, intellectually and spiritually.  I’m at bdfox@rogers.com where, believe it or not, the weeks are flying by.